Sunday, June 14, 2009

Burned

It was a fun vacation, he thought as the three if them piled into the car. It was time to return to reality. They had a long journey ahead of them and they were anxious to be done with it, to be able to sleep in their own beds for the first time in two weeks.

-- -- -- -- -- --



He could feel the immense heat burning into his flesh. Where is everyone? He thought. He tried to get out of the heat, but he was trapped. There was a scream, but he couldn't make out where it was coming from. It sounded like someone familiar was being tortured. He wanted to make the torture stop, but he was unable to move.

The heat disappeared, but he could still feel the searing pain all over his body. He was being lifted by something, but he was too out of it too try and figure out what it was, or where it was taking him.

Something bit him in the crease of his elbow and soon everything went dark.



-- -- -- -- -- --



He could finally open his eyes, but nothing seemed right. He was on a ship in the middle of the ocean, wearing an eye patch and pirate hat.

The wind hit him in the face, burning his eyes and his lungs when he tried to breathe in the air.

Mist from the water reached up and hit the air around him. He tried to feel it, but when he moved towards it, it pulled back, refusing to satisfy him with it's cool touch.

The sun beating down on him was fire on his skin. He could feel the burning rays as he tried relentlessly to immerse himself in the water. He closed his eyes in his frustration, and when he opened them again, the scene changed.

He was now in the middle of a scorching desert, pulling a handcart that sheltered all of his belongings. His family trudged on beside him. He looked around, searching for the two members missing from his party. He turned to his wife, tears streaking in the dirt on her face. He tried to ask her what had happened, seeing a burning pile from the corner of his eye, but there seemed to be something blocking his speech.


His surroundings changed again. To his right, the body of one of his sons was spralled across the
road, lying in a pool of red liquid. To his left was the overturned car, entrapping his other son. He
could hear the screaming again. It was coming from the car. He ran towards it. He had to try and
save him from suffering the same fate as the now lifeless body in the street. When he finally reached
it, it burst into flame and everything went black.

-- -- -- -- -- --



The massive pain began to return. Something changed. He was no longer in a fog, pain-free state. He forced his eyes open. In front of him was a nurse, maliciously holding a needle to his IV line. "He's trying to kill me!" He thought, "Why is no one trying to stop the?"

He Couldn't remember when it was, or what had happened since his camping trip in the redwoods.

He searched for a familiar face, but all he could see were the distorted faces of the monstrous nurses.

Just then, his beautiful wife walked into the room. He tried to reach out to her, but as soon as he raised his arm, he saw his blackened skin. He wanted to ask what was happening, but something was blocking his speech.

He glanced down and there was what seemed to be a snake in his mouth. He bit down on it hard, bitting it in half.

As soon as it was detached, his ability to breath became painful and barely there. The machines that he hadn't notices were attached to him started screaming.


-- -- -- -- -- --


They all sat around the campfire, all of them trying to keep warm in the unseasonably cool weather. He scanned the circle of family surrounding him. He didn't want to leave them. He loved his grandchildren very much, and with them living so far away, he hardly ever got to see them.

His sons, Hunter and Scott, sat next to him, roasting marshmallows.

"You're going to burn that," he informed Hunter

"I know, that's the way I like it," Hunter replied as he pulled out the flame-covered marshmallow.

He looked into the fire, mesmerized by the way it seemed to move on its own. It then started to change. Morphing back into another memory. A more recent, painful one.

He was standing in front of his burning expedition, trying to get the door open, ignoring the feeling of the flesh being burned off his hands and feet. He had to save him. He couldn't loose them both.


-- -- -- -- -- --


"Honey? Are you awake?" His wife asked him, pulling him away from his memories.

He looked up at her. He was still unable to talk, but there was no need to, she already knew what he wanted to ask.

"You were in a car accident, Scott fell asleep and the car rolled," she said, tears overflowing from her eyes. "No one else survived." He had to turn away; he was unable to bear the pain of remembering anymore. This would always be the reality he would wake up to. There would be no way to forget the pain of his loss.





Sunday, March 29, 2009

Hidden Depression
You want me to talk about it?
About the constant pain
Caused by remembering
Unable to forget the loss
Always hurting inside
That's why I hide it from the world
Keep silent in my misery
Some say misery loves company
But I dont' want to share it
No one should hold theese feelings
No one should have to know
About the constant suffering
Willing the end to come
But unwilling to steel something else
From the ones I love
I can't talk about it
Just remembering brings the pain
The moister running down my face
I hate them
The tears
They betray that brave front
Showing my vulnerability
Just trying to live through it
Through life one step at a time
What's happened can't be rewond
The unshared story
Dying to get out
But I keep it trapped locked up
Away from those who try to see
Trying to be happy
Cause that's the only way to keep
From Crying
Trying to hide the stabbing I feel
A I even fooling you?
Is all my effort a waste?
No. It keeps me sane
Even if you see through
The mask I wear
Seeing through my cover
Through the forced smile
Under the happy
Smilig face
Hides a secret
A hidden depression
I wrote this because my mom thinks that I should talk about loosing my brothers more often. Because that's how she gets through it. And she doesn't think that I should keep it bottled up. Well this is why I keep it inside. I needed to write something inspired by a picture. And if you haven't read my other blog this is a picture that I took of my best friend. I thought that this poem and subject went well with this picture.

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Solitude

Solitude
Standing strong
Out of the crowd
Being different
Who cares what they think
The robots of conformity
They don't matter
Their minds are lostin the worls
While you hold strong
Voicing your thoughts
doing the unpopular
Not to rebel,
But because you want to
Stand strong
Nothing can sway
Your strong roots
Showing how you feel
Showing who you really are
Nothing can stand in your way
You hold firm
Walk with a purpose
Unchanged by the world
A solid force
Trying to show people
That its good to be different
But no one listens
You stand alone
Tall and strong
In Solitude

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

The End
Is it here or there
Near or far
There is no way to be sure
It is undefined
The unseen force
Swaying everything in it's path
Leaving sadness and joy
It is coming
There is no way to escape
It continues Relentlesly
Making memories
It is the end